iWill Love You Forever
by PurpleProbie22
Summary: A sequel to iLove Both of Them. Freddie finds out Sam's illness, how will he react? Can he deal with the fact that Sam might be going to leave him again, now permanently? And who's Annie, that little girl he met?
1. Prologue

He walks in and sees the woman he's been searching for.

She has been waiting for him. She sits on her bed, and smiles.

She looks different, so thin and fragile. Her golden hair is way shorter than it was. Her skin looks so pale, and so do her lips.

_She is very sick_, he thinks. He feels so scared. He doesn't want to lose her, not again. He really wants her to fight, whatever happens. He misses the old her, the strongest girl he's ever met. He hopes she's still willing to try and hold on. He stares at her, wishing she could read his mind.

She can. The smile on her face fades away, and her eyes tell him what's on her mind.

_I'm tired. I can't take it anymore. I want to give up._

And with that, his heart breaks into pieces.

She smiles, "Long time no see, nub," she says weakly. Yet, she tries to sound stronger.

"I've missed you," his voice cracks, as he runs to her side and hug her.

"I know," she whispers.

And they cry.


	2. Chapter 1: After All These Years

**A/N: Okaaaaaaaaay, I'm sorry that it took forever to post this chapter! The holiday is over and I didn't have much time to do the chap. Plus… I had a HUGE writer's block. It sucks. Anyway, here's the chapter! Enjoy :D**

**Disclaimer: I do NOT own iCarly and its characters. I just wish I did.**

* * *

><p><strong>(Melanie's POV)<strong>

**1.05 p.m**

"Are you sure you will be okay, mommy?" a little girl asks.

"Sure, you don't have to worry, honey," she hugs the little girl and kisses her on her forehead. "Now, go find something to eat in the cafetaria with Aunt Mel. I'll talk to the doc for a while and then we can go home," she smiles.

"Ahhh-kay, mommy!" she grabs my hand with her left hand. Her right hand waves goodbye. "I'm going to eat ice cream! I love you."

"Love you too," her mom smiles and whispers to my ears, "do not buy her ice creams," and then she turns around to talk to the doctor.

"Okay, Sam!" I say as I turn around and walk with the little girl.

"So, are we going to eat?" the little girl stares at me, waiting for my answer.

"Yes. What do you want to eat, Annie?" we walk to the cafetaria.

"I want eat ice cream!" she giggles as we sit at a table.

"Hmm, I think they don't have ice creams here. What about french fries?" I ask her. She nods, then I order some french fries and a cup of green tea.

We don't talk much while eating, drinking and waiting for Sam. A few minutes later Sam appears and Anna runs to hug her.

"Mommy, why did it take so long?" Anna cries, "I'm scared if something happens to you."

Sam smiles, "You don't have to worry. I just needed to talk to the doc, nothing else." She kisses Anna's forehead and look at me, "Now, Melanie, do you mind if I ask you to carry Anna in your arms? I think she's already sleepy. And I'm tired… and lazy," she grins.

"Sure thing, Samantha," I smirk back and she rolls her eyes.

"Have I not told you not to call me with that name?"

"Why? I've told you a thousand times that I like the name, it's pretty," I laugh and grab Anna's waist and carry her on my arm, as she slowly closes her eyes and begins to sleep. We walk outside the hospital and get into my car. I lay Anna on the backseat of my car.

"And I've told you it's too girly," she sits on the passenger's seat and closes the door. I drive the car to our home.

* * *

><p><strong> Puckett's, London; 2.15 p.m<strong>

"So," I whisper quietly, "what did the doctor say?"

Sam and I sit on a couch near her/Anna's bed in their bedroom. She sighs. "Well, as usual, it wasn't a pretty good thing."

I gulp. Sam's leukemia has been worse lately. 3 years ago, she was cured. We all thought the blood cancer had gone. But sadly, last year she got an attack, and the doctor said her cancer was back.

And since then, her condition is getting worse and worse.

"What did he say?" I try to control my shaky voice.

"It's nothing different that he had said earlier to you," she smiles, as if it doesn't bother her at all, "I'm getting worse. He's not sure there's something we can do."

I feel my eyes begin to water, but I hold it back. I don't wanna cry in front of her. I really don't.

We stare at each other's eyes for a moment, then I stand up and turn around. A few drops of tears fall, and I quickly wipe them off my face.

I look around her bedroom. Her room isn't that large, but isn't too small either. The walls are painted purple and brown. Brown is her favorite color, and Anna has said that she likes purple. There is a queen sized bed, where Anna is sleeping on. On the right side of the bed, there is a small table with a small table lamp on it. There's also a comfy couch near the bed, on the left side of it. The couch is placed next to the wall.

Her room is on the second floor of the house, while mine is on the first floor. This is our dad's house. We moved here 5 years ago, in order to find a better way to get Sam recovered from her illness. Sam never went to visit Seattle, not once. And she never plans on visiting her old friends. She doesn't want to, she never does. She said it's way better to leave _them _behind and never look back. She says it will make everything easier for her and it won't hurt her. But I can tell that she's still hurt. She misses her life in Seattle, and I know it.

I notice that Sam still keeps a picture of them; she and her best friends. She keeps it hanging on the wall, right across her bed. So when she wakes up and gets up from her bed, I'm sure that the first thing she will see is the picture.

I stare at the picture, wondering how Sam's life was in Seattle. Was it perfect? Did her illness really destroy her life completely?

I murmur, "Do you miss them?"

"Who?"

I turn around, "Them."

She sighs.

* * *

><p><strong>(Sam's POV)<strong>

_Do you miss them?_

Why did you ask me that, Mel? I smile a little, "A bit," I lie.

"Have you ever wondered about how their lives now? About how things are going with them? Have you ever talked to them since you left, even just once?" she muttered.

"I never talked to them. But I know how they are. Freddie's now a successful young movie director and Carly's now a famous singer-songwriter. I don't have to wonder how things are going with them. I know they're happy," I smile.

"You never know that."

"Know what?"

"Whether they're happy or not."

"Well, they lives are perfect! They're both famous, successful, and incredibly rich, wouldn't they be happy?" I scoff. Melanie's insane.

"They might be missing you."

"They wouldn't even remember me, Mel."

"How can you say that? You never know how they felt since you abandoned them and just left without even telling them why!" Melanie shakes her head in desperation.

"And you don't know either."

"But—uh." Melanie loses her words. "Why don't you just call them, just for once?" she whispers. "I know you miss them, Sam. And I bet they miss you too."

I look away. Tears begin to form and start to run through my cheek. Thinking about them still hurts. I do regret that I left them without saying a word before. But I'm sure this was the best way for all of us.

I close my eyes for a second and then stare at Melanie. "Who said I didn't miss them?"

Melanie sits beside me, on the couch, wanting me to speak.

"I miss them. I miss _him_. But I don't wanna hurt them, seeing me like _this_. It's better for me, for them, not knowing my condition."

I can't hold my tears, and I let myself quietly crying in her arms.

* * *

><p><strong>(Freddie's POV)<strong>

**The next day at Benson's, Bushwell Plaza, Seattle; 10.30 a.m**

I stuff my huge suitcase with a lot of clothes I'm going to wear.

As a movie director, I have to fly across the world to do the filming. I've flown to Japan, Paris, Italy, and a lot of other amazing places on Earth. And tomorrow morning, I'm going to fly to another beautiful place I've never been.

I guess now people are wondering how I can be so successful at the age of 23. Well, let's just say that my former job as a tech-producer on iCarly helped me, a lot. I got famous, and it made everything easier for me to get job. Shortly—really shortly—after I finished my college, I got my first job as a music video director. And then a TV-movie director. And within a year, the name Fredward Benson is known as a successful young movie director.

By the way, I still live in Seattle with my mom—even though the relationship between Mom and I is getting worse—and I never buy my own house or apartment. But my job as a movie director forces me to leave this apartment every once in a while. Well, actually I never really spend my days in Seattle since I went to college because I'm really busy. I always stay only get home once or twice in a month.

My job keeps me busy. I like it. No, it's not that I like being busy… but this job makes me forget about reality for a while. It makes me forget about the pain I've been dealing with through the years.

But, yes, I still feel pain sometimes. No matter how busy I am, no matter how many works I have to do, I still feel pain.

I miss her. _Samantha Puckett…_

I really regret everything. I regret that I hurt her. I regret that I didn't have a chance to make her stay. I regret that I was such a jerk. I regret… and now it's too late.

She's gone. I don't know where she is, I never know. And I might never will. And it hurts.

Ever since she left, I never fell in love. I think I'm stuck, I can't forget her. I can't open my heart for someone else.

And almost every night, all I can do is lay on my bed, hold two or three bottles of vodka, get drunk, and cry. People always think my life is perfect now. I'm fudging rich and successful and I must be as happy as hell. But the truth is, I'm not. I'm a wreck inside. My life is messed up. I argue with my mom every time I visit Seattle. I stopped doing the best thing that ever happened on my life. I lost my best friend and my first puppy love. I lost the girl that meant the world to me.

Now you guys might be wondering where Carly is.

When we cancelled iCarly, she was really sad and upset. iCarly was her life. She didn't want to stop doing it. But doing iCarly without Sam wouldn't be the same. She was really mad and disappointed, and we got into a huge argument. Since then, she stopped talking to me.

She avoided me, although I lived across her apartment. She never talked to me, she never wanted to see me. In our last days in high school, she found her new _best friends_. They went to parties, gossiped, flirted with random boys and slept with them at the night. She changed. And even Spencer couldn't do anything to stop her. It was her only way to forget the pain about Sam's disappearance.

She graduated high school with not-so-good grades. She didn't even go to college. She went to some clubs and café and sing and posted some videos of her singing to SplashFace. And a few years ago, someone from a famous record label saw her videos and he was interested in her talent. Long story short, she signed a recording contract and BAM, now she's one of the best selling female singer in US and Europe, and she moved to Paris, France, and tries to pursue her career there. And yeah, her popularity from iCarly also helped her to be famous.

I never meet her since I went to New York after the graduation. Honestly, I miss her.

I miss my old life. I miss the times when there were the three of us. Now we've changed. I'm no longer a dork. Carly's no longer a sweet person. And Sam is... unknown.

If only I could go back…

I sigh and zip my suitcase. After leaving a note to my mom saying I'm leaving Seattle for a few weeks or months, I walk outside the building and get into my car.

* * *

><p><strong> Puckett's, London; 8.41 p.m<strong>

**(3rd Person's POV)**

Sam Puckett closes the book as she finishes reading the fairytale to her daughter, Anna, or she usually calls Annie. She turns around and finds out that Anna isn't asleep yet. She sighs.

"Annie, I've done reading you the story. Now, it's time for you to sleep."

Anna shakes her head, "I'm not sleepy."

"But it's almost 9 p.m, darling," Sam kisses Anna's forehead.

"I don't wanna sleep," Anna hugs her mom, "I want you to tell me about dad. You never speak of him, not once!"

Sam freezes. Anna is just a 4 years old little girl, but sometimes, she talks older than she should be. She understands things, even if nobody tells her. She knows about Sam's illness, and she's curious about her dad.

"Mom?" Anna raises her eyebrows.

"Hm?"

"I wanna know about dad. Why haven't I see him? Where is he? I wanna see him. Is he still alive?"

"Well, he's still alive," Sam forces a smile.

"And then, where is he? Why isn't he here?"

"He's busy, honey. But maybe, just maybe, someday you'll meet him." Sam caresses Anna's dark brown hair.

Anna sighs. "Okay, then. Tell me about him! Do I look like him?"

"Hmmm," Sam frowns, "I think you do look like him."

"Yay!" Anna giggles happily. "What does he look like?

Sam touches Anna's hair once again, "See, you have his dark brown hair. But his hair isn't curly. You got your curly hair from me. He has brown eyes, not like you. You have mine, see? And," Sam tickles Anna's neck and they laughed, "you have his short neck. Um, and," Sam touches Anna's lips and smiles, "your smile looks exactly like his."

Anna smiles, "Wow. I really wanna see dad! Do you have his pictures? I wanna see it!"

Sam sighs, "No, I don't," she lies. "But someday you'll meet him."

"Really?"

"Yes."

"You promise?"

"I promise," Sam said hesitantly.

"Okay! Now I can sleep. I hope he will come to my dreams," she giggles. Just a few minutes later, she falls asleep.

Sam kisses Anna's forehead and whispers, "I love you," and walks outside the room.

Sam walks downstairs to the living room and sits on the couch. She turns on the TV.

"Melanie?" she calls.

Melanie yells from the kitchen, "Yeah?"

"What are you doing in the kitchen?"

"Making macaroni and cheese. I'll be there in a sec!"

Sam switches the channel over and over again. There's nothing interesting to watch. Only talkshows, cliché and stupid romance shows, and gossips.

A few moments later, Melanie sits beside Sam and puts a huge bowl of macaroni and cheese on the coffee table. "Here," Melanie hands Sam a spoon and they eat the macaroni together.

"Thanks, Mel. Hey, where's dad? Why isn't he home yet?" Sam asks.

"Well, he called me earlier. He said he isn't coming home until tomorrow night."

"Oh, okay. And have you called mom or Alex? I miss her so much." Sam switches again the channel as Melanie nods and keeps eating the macaroni, "Hey, Mel?"

"Yeah?"

"You know you haven't had a boyfriend since… uh, my cancer came back, right?"

"Yeah, and?" Melanie raises her eyebrows.

"Well, I thought you can't live without boyfriend." Sam shrugs.

"I can't live without you, Sam. Who cares about boyfriends?" Melanie smiles. "It's no use thinking about my love life right now. I'd rather spent my precious moments with you—"

"—because I'm dying?" Sam cuts off Melanie's words.

Melanie stares at her and smiles, "No. Because you're my twin sister and I love you."

"I love you too," Sam smiles, and then she grabs a spoonful of macaroni and put it on her mouth.

"Sam?" Melanie whispers.

"Huh?"

"Do you realize that the news is about… Freddie Benson?"

"Um, what?" Sam widens her eyes and watches the news, "Oh. Yeah."

"_The 23 year old movie director Fredward Benson was seen leaving the Bushwell Plaza, Seattle yesterday morning, where he lives. He—"_

"Why do people care so much where he lived?" Sam scoffs and keeps eating the macaroni.

"_Benson is known as a young yet brightly successful movie director. At the age of 13, he, along with his former best friends Carly Shay who is also well-known as the best selling female singer of the year, and Samantha Puckett did a popular webshow iCarly where he was doing his job as a technical producer and the cameraman. The webshow ended in the middle of 2011 after they graduate high school. The webshow was—"_

"Do you miss iCarly?" Melanie whispers while the TV screen shows some old short clips of the webshow.

Sam sighs and smiles sadly, "Of course I do."

"_Currently, Benson and his crews are filming a movie based on a best selling supernatural novel of the year, _Where The Wind Blows_. It is official that Tyler Drew and Clarice Kingston are playing the lead roles. The movie is set to release in late summer 2017. The filming begins next week in—"_

Sam turns off the TV right when it shows a close-up picture of _him_.

She misses him. She admits that.

But what can she do? She never wants to hurt him…

* * *

><p><strong>AN: soooooo, what do you think about the first chapter? Do you guys like it? hope you guys like it! well, this isn't my best chapter. It's a bit messed up, and I'm sorry if I did some errors there. I'm sleeeeeeeeeeeepeeeeeyyyyy -_- After all, I hope I don't disappoint you guys.**

**Just so you know… I changed my pen name to Sleepless Dreamer 22. I didn't confuse you guys, right?**

**R&R! xxxx**


	3. Chapter 2: Finally Found You, I guess?

**Disclaimer: I do not own iCarly**

* * *

><p><strong>(Freddie's POV)<strong>

**London, 8.25 a.m**

I like being in London.

We—my crews and i—arrived here two days ago to prepare the filming here. With the first step I took on the ground, I already loved this place. **(A/N: I actually have never been to London… but I'd really love to go there!)**

I walk outside the hotel and breathe deeply. London is beautiful, no doubt.

My phone suddenly yells. I take it from my pocket and look at the screen, an unknown number is calling me. I clear my throat and press the _answer_ button.

And then I hear a familiar voice of a girl I've never heard in ages.

"Hello?" she says.

I gasp. I know this voice… I remember this voice…

I whisper in shock, "Carly Shay?"

"Ah, so you must be Fredward Benson—thank God I didn't call the wrong number. A-and I'm… I'm glad you still remember my voice," she stutters.

"Of course, I do. Oh my God… Carly… H-how are you?" I stutter, too.

"I'm fine. Paris is great. I, uh, I-I miss you, Freddie. I'm sorry for everything…" she sobs.

"For what?"

"For changing! I was such a bitch. Well, I still am. I'm sorry… I was just disappointed... I'm sorry, I'm sorry."

I sigh, "That's okay, Carls. It's the past… we shall move on," I swallow, "anyways, what brings you to call me?"

"Uh, well… firstly, it's been a long time since the last time we talked—and it was an argument—and I kinda miss you. Secondly, I need you to help me!"

"Sure thing. What can I do to help you?"

"I need a movie director for my newest music video. And I'm sure you're the perfect one. Please? Help me, will you?"

I smile. "Of course I will. Now, tell me everything about the song and we'll film the video as soon as possible."

"Okay. We'll I think I'll just send you an e-mail later. Right now, I wanna ask you about something."

"What?"

"Have you heard of Sam?" she whispers.

* * *

><p><strong>Puckett's, 9.02 p.m<strong>

**(Anna's POV)**

Mom walks out as she closes the door. I get up and turn on the table lamp.

I am not sleepy at all. Almost every night after mom tells me a story or sing to me before I "sleep", I get up from my bed and look around her—our—bedroom.

I know mom lied to me. I saw his picture, _my dad_. He has the exact same short neck, brown hair, and smile like me… I guess. But I'm really sure he's my dad.

The one thing that I really wanna know is… why does mom keep avoiding every time I ask about him? What did he do? What did she do? Why isn't he here with me now? I miss my dad, I really wanna see him.

I found his picture in mom's closet. I turn the photo and find something.

At the back of the photo, it is written, "Fredward Benson, 2011". And, uhm, yes. I can read. I'm 4 years old but I can read. I learn faster than every 4 year old child in the world.

Wait… Fredward Benson? Why does that name sound familiar to me?

Nevermind. I just have to find him.

But other than that, there's something I have to worry about.

Mom's sick. I know she has a cancer. Blood cancer, I think. I don't know what cancer is, but I know it's awful. Mom never told me that, but I know. I overheard her conversation with Aunt Mel. I see her losing weight day by day. I'm scared, I don't wanna lose mom. I love her very much, she's the best thing in my 4 year life.

Mom and Aunt Mel is very similar, but I can tell their differences. First of all, of course, mom is way skinnier than Aunt Mel, and Aunt Mel is a bit taller than mom. And their eyes are also different. Mom's eyes are more brighter, icy blue like mine. Aunt Mel's are more like sapphire stone, deep dark blue, and sometimes it looks almost like purple, my favorite color. And their hair is also different. Mom's curly and short, Aunt Mel said it was because she lost her hair while doing therapy, but now it's growing longer and longer. Aunt Mel's hair is long, and she straightens it.

I look around again, searching for something that contains more information about that dude, Fredward Benson. But then I hear footsteps. I run into my bed and pretend to sleep again. That's when mom opens the door, walks in and closes it. and then she lies beside me, and falls asleep.

I cuddle in her chest, and then I also fall asleep, dreaming about my dad.

* * *

><p><strong>The next morning at Puckett's, 10.20 a.m<strong>

**(Sam's POV)**

I had another attack this morning. My head suddenly felt dizzy and the world spun around. Blood ran from my nose, just like the first attack I had when I was 18.

And now, I'm in the hospital with Melanie, Anna, and dad.

Just a moment ago, they all went out. Now there's only me and Dr. James in the room. He's been talking for almost 5 minutes about my condition, but I don't feel like listening his words.

I don't have to listen to his words. I don't even want to. I know what he says, I'm getting worse.

"Did you understand, Ms. Puckett?"

_Understand what?_ "Uh, yes of course."

"Good," he stands up and opens the door. "Take care of yourself."

I nod, and watch him walk away. The door opens again, now Mel is going to get inside.

"No, Mel. I wanna be alone," I sigh, "Just… take Anna and dad to a café near the hospital. I need some time. I'll call you later."

Mel gives an understanding smile, "Okay," and closes the door. Leaving me alone.

I take a deep breath. Sooner or later, I'm leaving this world. Permanently. All I can do is just wait.

* * *

><p><strong>Harold's Café, somewhere near a hospital; 11.04 a.m<strong>

**(Freddie's POV)**

I've waited Tiffany—my assistant—for a half an hour and she suddenly said she couldn't make it. I sigh. People like her are just wasting my time.

I take a last sip of my vanilla latte, as a little girl with brunette hair walks to me. I stare at her with a questioning look. She looks so cute.

She stops right in front of my table.

"Can I help you, sweetheart?" I ask her, smiling.

She nods. "Are you Fredward Benson?"

I smirk, "Yes, yes I am. And who are you?"

"I'm Anna, but my mom and my auntie sometimes call me Annie."

I smile awkwardly. "Uh, okay… Where's your mom, sweetie?"

I stare at her. Something in her looks familiar to me, but I can't think of it… maybe her eyes? Or…

She sighs, "She's in the hospital."

I frown. Maybe, she want me to take her to her mom? "Okay, then. Do you want me to take you—"

"—are you my dad?" she cuts my words. My jaw drops.

I freeze. "I'm sorry?"

"Are you my daddy?" she repeats.

"Wh-wha—"

She cuts my words again, "—my mom always says that I got my dark hair, short neck, and this sweet smile from my dad, and I think yours look exactly like mine. Are you my dad?" she blabs.

I can't answer her. Who is she? Who is her mom? How does she know me? How—

Before I could speak, a woman walks to my table and talks to the little girl.

"Annie, mom always told you not to talk to strangers!" she speaks as the little girl—Anna, or Annie—turns around to face her.

Anna speaks, "He's not a stranger. He's my dad!"

"What—" the woman's voice sounds familiar. I lift my head to face her, as she looks down to face me. We stare at each other's face for a moment.

_Blonde curly hair. Blue eyes. Pale skin. Where have I seen her?  
><em>

I realize and stand up. Shocked. My heartbeat stops.

I whisper, my voice sounds shaky.

"Sam Puckett? Is… is that you?"

* * *

><p><strong>AN: short chapter, I know. But I still hope you'd enjoy! Read and Review :D**


	4. Chapter 3: I've Missed You

**A/N: Hey everyone! First of all, I'm really sorry that I didn't update very soon. There's a lot of school works, plus my dad didn't allow me to use my laptop. And when he did, I got another freaking writer's block… But this is it, another chapter of iWill Love You Forever. R&R, enjoy!**

**Note: this isn't really a chapter… it's kinda short and pointless. Anyway, I still hope you'll like it. If this chapter isn't that good, blame the writer's block!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own iCarly… because I'm just a 14 year old girl. If only I were older…..**

* * *

><p><strong>(Freddie's POV)<strong>

"Sam Puckett? Is that you?"

I feel like losing my breath. The woman in front of me, with long blonde curly hair and bright blue eyes who wears a long maroon blouse that looks almost like a dress and black leggings, looks so familiar to me. She is Sam. _She is Sam, isn't she?_

Her eyes wide open. Our jaws both drop to the ground, and she stutters. "I… I…"

I can't find a word to say, so I just stand there, waiting for the words that will fall from her mouth.

The little girl looks up to her, "He's my daddy, isn't he?" she giggles.

"Annie," she looks away and talks to Annie and points at a 50-ish years old man who's ordering something, "there's your grandpa. Come to him and go back to the hospital. I'll meet you later."

"Okay," Annie still giggles and walks away.

"Sam—"

"Hi, Freddie. I'm sorry, I'm not Sam." She says in one breath.

I raise my eyebrows. If she's not Sam, then who is she? She looks a lot like Sam. She just looks like her tw—wait…

"I'm Melanie, Sam's sister. Remember? Sam wouldn't wear these girly things on her body," she awkwardly laughs.

I smile. "Oh, right. So, uh, how are you?"

"I'm fine," she smiles, "how are you?"

"Well, I…"

She shakes her head and smiles, "Oh, I shouldn't have asked. You're a famous movie director. Your life must be fabulous. I'm happy for you," we laugh.

"Melanie?"

"Yeah?"

"Where's Sam? And who was that little girl?"

Melanie looks a bit confused, like she doesn't know what to say. "Sam's… she's, uh, somewhere. I'll take you to her later," she smiles.

I don't understand what that means, but I slowly nod. "And that girl is…"

"… your daughter."

* * *

><p>Melanie hasn't answered my questions. She just grabbed my hands and walked. Now we're entering a hospital next to the café.<p>

"Melanie, why are we here?" I ask.

"Just follow me."

"And how come that girl is my daughter?"

"Sam will answer," she walks faster.

"Sam? Wait, is Sam here? Why is she here? Why is Sam in a hospital? Is she sick?" I bombard her with many question.

She smiles sadly, "She isn't sick."

"So why is she here?"

"She's dying," she mumbles.

I stop walking. So does she. I pull my hand away, "I'm sorry?"

"She's dying, Freddie."

"Wh-how-what…"

"Come with me," she grabs my hand and walks. We stop right in front of a room.

"Melanie… I don't un—"

"Ssh, wait here." She opens the door and walks inside. A moment later, Annie and her grandpa walks out from the room. They don't notice me, so they just walk away to the lift.

I rub my forehead. I still don't understand. Why is Sam here? And why did Melanie say she's dying?

"You can come in," Melanie's voice brings me back to reality.

"Okay. Thanks."

Before I walk inside, Melanie once again grabs my hand. "Freddie, I know it's hard for you. But… I hope you're strong enough."

I frown as she lets go my hand and walks away. I walk inside the room.

And there she is, the woman I've been searching for. The woman I've been dreaming of. The woman I've been crying for.

She's sitting on a white bed. The room isn't large, but isn't small. The wall is painted broken white. There's a chair on the left side of the bed, a small table on the right side of the bed, and also a small couch on the other side of the room. There's a small TV in front of the couch, which is turned off.

She looks like she's been waiting for me.

She looks different, so thin and fragile. Her golden hair is way shorter than it was. Her skin looks so pale, and so do her lips.

But although she looks different, I know this is Sam.

Was Melanie right? Is Sam dying?

If she is, why? Why is she dying? What happened to her that I didn't know?

She smiles.

She is very sick.

I'm scared. I don't want her to di—leave. I don't wanna lose her, not again. I just found her, I don't wanna lose her.

But if she's really dying, then she's…

No, she can't leave. She has to fight, whatever happens.

But her eyes… look tired. It's like they're telling me that she's giving up.

For a second, the smile on her face fades away. And when I step closer to her, she smiles and breaks the silence.

"Long time no see, nub," she speaks softly. _Weakly_.

Her voice. _Her voice_. The voice I haven't heard for 5 years. Oh, how I miss this voice…

I can't hold the tears from my eyes. I don't care if she calls me a crybaby. I cry right in front of her.

"I've missed you," my voice cracks as the tears run down.

I run to her side and hug her so tight that I don't wanna let go. She hugs me and rubs my back, trying to comfort me, and places her head right next to my left ear.

"I know," she whispers softly.

We cry like we've never cried before.

_I find her. I finally find her_.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Is it good? Is it bad? Tell me! Review! And I also accept critics, so if I do some mistakes here you can tell me and i'll try to fix the mistakes! :)**


	5. Chapter 4: The Arrival and Realization

**A/N: Hey guys! I'm a bad person. I KNOW. I haven't updated ALL my stories for weeks. I totally apologize!**** (P.S: I was tryin to update my other multichap fic, Things Change, but I had a trouble uploading it, so, I decided to update this story first, hehe)**

**I have a great news. You know what? Yes! I've decided to continue this story! Haha! But I won't be updating really often—and I'm also thinking about writing another fic. Gaaaah, what is wrong with my head? I always lost inspiration in a story, and then got an inspiration for ANOTHER story. Stupid stupid stupid.**

**Anyways, have you seen iDate Sam and Freddie promos? AAHHHHH! I can't wait. And the promo for the season 5… omgomgomgomg this season is gonna be EPIC. I just cannot wait. I hope Dan won't make us wait too long for the premieres of each new episodes.**

**And guys, don't forget to check out my other fics. And my first Humor/Romance oneshot, "Driving Me Crazy". I hope you guys like it! : P**

**Kay, enough blabbing. On to the story!**

**Disclaimer: Have I ever owned Zoey 101 and Drake & Josh, and Victorious? No? Then I do not own iCarly either.**

…

**(Carly's POV)**

**9 p.m; Paris, France**

_**I found Sam. – Freddie B.**_

I read that text again and again, for like the 29th time since I received the text. I try to control my breath as I call Freddie.

"Hey, Carly."

"Freddie? Freddie! Did you really find Sam? Where is she? Oh my God, I miss her so much. Where can I meet her? How is she?"

"Carls… slow down… breathe."

I take a breath, "Yeah, uh, sorry. So…?"

He sighs, "Sam's here in London. She lives here. I, uh, I met Melanie in a café and she brought me to Sam."

"Oh my God, oh my God." I whisper. "I'm so glad you finally find her. You have no idea how much I miss her."

"Can you… can you come here to London?" he asks.

"Of course I—wait, I'll look my schedule. Oh well, nevermind, I will cancel everything and I'll be in London as soon as I can!"

…

**A few minutes later**

I drop my big suitcase and take a deep breath. I open it, getting ready to pack my clothes. Jamie, my manager, has helped me to clear my schedule for this whole month and she even bought the flight ticket to London for me. She knows who Sam and Freddie are, she knows everything, and she understands that I miss them very much. She is the best manager ever.

"Ms. Shay, you ready?"

I take a deep breath once again and smile, "I am ready."

"You haven't seen them in a long time. Are you sure you can do this alone? I mean, if you want me to go with you, I'll go," she shrugs.

"No, I'm okay, Jamie."

"What about the paparazzi?" Jamie raises her eyebrows.

"Uh, I'm sure no one knows that I'm going to London," I bit my lip. I'm not really sure… "Yeah. No one knows I'm going to London, right?" I whisper to myself.

"Just pray that no one leaked the news about this," Jamie smiles. "Now, let's start packing!"

…

**The next morning; London City Airport, 9.57 a.m**

The plane just arrives at London half an hour ago and now I'm walking outside the airport. I put on my sunglasses and my white/beige scarf on my neck. Freddie said he would pick me up but he's nowhere to be seen.

"Ugh, Freddie, Freddie, Freddie, where are you?" I mutter under my breath and suddenly someone taps on my right shoulder.

I turn around and scream, "AHHH! Who are you? What do you want from me? I—oh, it's you, Freddie," I let out a relief sigh, and then my eyes grow wide "FREDDIE? Oh my God! It's you!"

"Yeah, it's me, Carls!" he smiles. I open my arms wide and we hug for a few seconds.

"Oh, God. It's you, it's really you! I miss you very much! I'm sorry for everything I've done in our last year of high school! I didn't mean to trash you like that. I was just disappointed and… Oh, God, Freddie… Freddie… I'm sorry, I was such a bitch… I miss you so much," I begin to sob but then he shushes me.

"Ssh, Carly it's okay. No time for talking about the past now. There's a lot of paparazzi out there and they almost saw me. It looks like they found out that you were going to London…"

I groan and wipe my tears away, "Uh, why can't my life be normal!" he chuckles and I realize something, "Hey, they might notice you as well. Here, I have another sunglasses. Put it on, maybe it can make you look less noticeable." I hand him sunglasses from my bag.

"Thanks, Carls. Let's go, I got here by taxi and it's still waiting for me. I'll take you to the hotel where I stay," he grabs my wrist and my huge suitcase, and we run, trying to hide from the paparazzi.

Well, they eventually get pictures of us. Running in the airport, hand-by-hand…

_God, please. Not another stupid rumors._

…

**Freddie's POV, 10.05 a.m**

I saw someone with brunette hair. Her hair is mid-length and it fell right on her shoulders. She wore a red skinny shirt with a beige scarf and zebra pattern printed leggings and black boots. She kept pacing back and forth with a huge black suitcase beside her, a white shoulder bag hanging on her right shoulder and a new black PearPhone in her right hand. Even though she put her sunglasses on, I could notice that it was my old best friend, the famous ex-webshow host and the singer with the best-selling album of the year, Carly Shay.

And I was right. We talked a bit, but then I told her that there were a lot of paparazzi out there so we immediately hid from them.

Now we're inside a taxi. We're going to the hotel where I stay. Of course she's gonna check into a different room. There is NO way we're gonna stay in a same room.

"So," she begins a conversation, "how did you find her?"

I take a deep breath, "I was in a café and then I saw a little girl. She came to me and asked me if I was Freddie Benson. I said yes and… uh, we… kinda talked. And then a woman called her out and when I saw her face, I thought it was Sam. Well, it was actually Melanie. I asked her where Sam was, and…"

"And what?"

I sigh, "She took me to a hospital," I mumble.

"What? What happened to Sam? Why was she in a hospital? God, Freddie—"

I cut her off, "And then I saw her. We talked a bit. Well, we cried. She has changed a lot, but she's still Sam." I say. Carly looks like she almost cry—wait, she's already crying. She hasn't seen Sam yet. If she sees Sam… she will freak out. And cry even more.

"I wanna meet her! Is she still in the hospital?"

"Yeah. But you better check in for a hotel room first, and then I'll bring you to her."

She nods, "Okay."

I close my eyes and take a deep breath.

"Freddie?"

"Hm?"

She looks straight into my eyes, "What happened to Sam?"

…

I watch Carly and Melanie hug each other and I just smile. They started to squeal and say things like "Oh my Gosh I miss you so much! I haven't seen you in years! Oh-em-gee it's you! It's you!" typical girls.

"So, where's Sam?" Carly asks.

Melanie glances at me and then she smiles at Carly, "She's inside that room," she points at a door with the number "239".

"Is she sick?" Carly seems so worried.

"Well," Melanie looks hesitated, "just come inside the room." She smiles.

"Okay," Carly inhales deeply and then looks at me, "wanna come with me?"

"No, I'm going to walk around here for a little while, I'll be back in 15 minutes, though." I wave goodbye and walk away. I need to think. Like, you know, about Sam's illness—she still doesn't wanna talk about it and the doctors won't tell me what her illness is—and that little girl.

That little girl. Why did she call me her dad? I've never had a children. I've never had s—

Oh my God. I had sex with Sam, 5 years ago, before she left.

Is she Sam's daughter? If so… _am I her dad?_

Oh my dearest God. I need to find out.

…

**A/N: Short chap, I know. So how do ya guys think? Did'ja like it? ****Who do you think the Anna girl is? ****Tell me! Leave a review! Critics and suggestions are accepted, but no flames, pweaseee. And again, I'm so sorry for abandoning this story. : ( I'm a bad person, but you'll still give some reviews for moi, right?**

**And lastly, I've decided to reply some reviews. I wanna be a nice person. Hahaha! : P**

**- Embrace Your Inner Gibby: Aaaw, thank you! And yeah, I've got my inspirations back XD And yeah, he is in London to film his new movie, but I think he'll abandon the movie for Sam... Haha**

**- SeddieLUV: Don't worry, here's a new chappie!**

**- SeDdIeLuVeR13: Thanks! I'm updating :)**

**- Generation Love Is Me: We're all glad that they finally meet XP**

**- SAM-seddie-FREDDIE: I'm afraid that this story will have a sad ending, well, I haven't decided yet. I mean, I'm already thinking about the ending (and the alternate ending), both sad and happy, and I'm still not sure which one to choose... but don't worry, I'll try my best to make this story less sappy :P**

**- prettykitty374: Here's more! Yay! : D**

**- vixxx: Thanks! I'm continuing!**

**- ShooshYeah35: Yeah, 5 years finally got him thinking about who he really loved, and his romantic feelings for Carls are gone! About Melanie, well, it's been 5 years since the last time he ever saw both of the twins, and at that moment he was desperately trying to find Sam, so he instantly thought that the blonde woman was Sam. And, yeah! He would never expect to find the twins in London while he was working on his new movie! Who would've thought anyway? :P**

**R&R, xo.**


	6. Chapter 5: Telling Carly

**A/N: Guys… I was disappointed because the last chappie didn't get too many reviews : ( But, oh well. At least someone actually read it, and it still made my day!**

**I decided to write this chap earlier because the holiday here is coming to an end. So… I'm giving you this chappie while i still have some free time before I lose my inspirations (again) and before all the assignments kill me slowly.**

**This chap is actually longer because I added Freddie's POV, but then I cut it and decided to add that part on the next chap because if I didn't cut it, this chapter will be REALLY long and it will be boring.**

**AND GUYYYYYSSSSSSS! HAVE YOU ALL SEEN THE iDATE SAM AND FREDDIE PICS ON NICK . COM? OMG I DIED. REALLY. THE PIC OF THEM KISSIN AND SMILIN IS JUST BEAUTIFUL I CAN'T EVEN... *brb fangirling***

**I just found out that there will be new episodes every week this September. Oh. My. God. I love Nickelodeon and Dan Schneider. I wanna give him a bone-crushing hug. Why? BECAUSE MY BIRTHDAY IS ON SEPTEMBER! This will be the best birthday ever! I'M SO EXCITED! I love September so much, even though I kinda hated it because last September 2nd was supposed to be my 1 year anniversary with my (ex)boyfriend… oh well nevermind.**

**Disclaimer: IF I DID OWN iCARLY iLOST MY MIND and iDATE SAM AND FREDDIE WOULD HAVE AIRED SINCE MONTHS AGO!**

**Read and Review, guys. You know I love reviews.**** And I also love you.**

…

**Sam's POV; 11.31 a.m**

"I'm sorry I never told you this, Carls," I whisper. Carly is sitting on a chair beside me, tears running on her cheek.

"No, you don't have to say sorry. I mean… it's just…" she shakes her head and cries even louder.

"Ssh, Carls… please don't cry," I feel my eyes burning with tears.

"How come you never told me that you have… have… this… this _illness_, Sam? Maybe I could help you… I could stay beside you… Why… why did you just leave?"

I smile weakly. "No, Carly. No one can help me, and I couldn't stay. Look at you now. You're crying. If I stayed, you'd cry everyday. And I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna see you cry. I don't wanna see my best friend like that. And I'm sorry I left. I never meant to hurt you, both of you, like that."

She takes a deep breath, trying to stop the tears. And then chuckles a bit, "You know what, Sam? You made me and Freddie freak out when you left. I felt guilty, because I thought you left because he kissed me. And so did Freddie."

"Yeah. But I think I've told you guys that it wasn't the reason why I left," I laugh.

She smiles as she grabs a tissue and wipe her tears.

"So, how did you guys react when I left?"

She looks down on her lap. "Well, I freaked out. I blamed Freddie. He couldn't say anything. He just stayed silent when I yelled at him that it was his fault. He just stood there when I slapped him and walked away. He just stared blankly. And we stopped talking."

I begin to feel guilty. I never knew that I hurt them that much…

She says quietly, "A few days ago, when I called him, that was the first time we ever talked ever since you left. I feel bad for him. I mean, I knew that he was feeling the same pain that I was feeling, but I just walked away from his life. He already lost you, and then I also left him. What I did was wrong. I tried to let you go because I knew you were not coming back. So I tried to find "new friends" and became a bitch. I left Freddie, I let him alone with his dorky books while I was wild-partying, getting drunk, sleeping with random guys I met at the party, being a brat… It's just…" she shakes her head again, and sobs. "I was such a bitch. I should've never done that. Freddie didn't deserve it. I should've been a good friend for Freddie, but all I did was getting wasted."

Without realizing it, I cry.

"And Spencer… well, he didn't take it well. At first he was being a good brother. He kept telling me that it was gonna be alright. He was there for me. But being a bitch I was, I left him. I left him when I got a recording contract. I left him to Paris, and I… I haven't seen him… I don't even know if he's stilll… alive…" she whispers.

"Oh my God… Carly… I'm so sorry… I'm sorry… I should have never left… I'm sorry…" I whisper.

She shakes her head, smiling.

"I'm sorry… I never knew that you guys… Oh my god, I'm such a monster…"

"It's okay, Sam," she holds my hand, "at least we're here now, together. And please, promise me you'll never leave me again. I just… I can't stand it. I felt so lost without you."

I nod my head and look straight into her eyes.

"You know, Sam, Freddie really loved you. He was broken when you left. He regretted not telling you that he loved you for real. He felt so bad because you accidentally heard him when he said he still loved me. He never loved me, he just misunderstood his feelings. When he finally realized that you were the one he really loved, you already left."

I bite my lower lip.

"Believe me, he loves you. I can't explain it. I just know, by seeing the look on his face, that he loves you. He still does."

"I…"

"And I know you still love him too."

"What should I do?" I whisper, more like talking to myself.

"All you have to do is to let him love you, Sam. Give him another chance. Don't leave him again. Let him love you, let him do the things he should've done 5 years a go, let him fix everything he broke in the past, let him stay by your side. I want you—both of you—to be happy," she smiles.

I half-smile. "Thanks, Carls."

We stay quiet for a moment. Busy with our own thoughts. But then she speaks softly, "Sam?"

"Mm?"

"How… how bad is it?" she asks, avoiding my eyes.

I inhale, "Pretty bad. The doctor says that… I only have a little chance to… you know, survive."

She looks down at her lap. The room is filled with silence again.

"So, how's your life? How does it like to be a famous singer?" I smirk.

She laughs, "Actually, it isn't really different than being famous on web. But being a singer is way harder. I mean, I didn't go to college just because my schedule was really busy. And the tours are crazy, Sam. It's really tiring. Believe me, the only thing you'd enjoy of being a famous singer is that you'd have a lot of money to buy meat as much as you want, and that you could have any guy you like. They will absolutely like you back."

I join her laughing, "You have a boyfriend?"

"Nah," she shakes her head, "I just broke up a few weeks ago."

"I'm sorry."

She shrughs, "It's okay. He was a douchebag anyway. He asked me out just because he wanted to be famous."

I groan, "That must be one of the annoying things of being a famous person."

"Yeah, you're right," we laugh.

Just then, someone opens the door. It's Melanie and Anna.

"Hey, Mel, Annie," I smile.

Annie walks towards me and hands me a bag of Fatcakes, "This is for you."

"Thanks, sweetie."

"You're welcome," she smiles widely.

Carly chuckles, "You still eat FatCakes?"

"Uh, yeah," I say in a 'duh' tone.

She shakes her head and then smiles to Anna.

"Hey, Annie?"

"Yes?"

"Can you do me a favor?"

"Of course. What is it?"

"Can you find Freddie? Tell him that I want to see him."

"Of course!" she runs to Melanie and grabs her hand. "Bye!" she waves at us, and so does Melanie.

After the door closes, Carly looks at me. "Sam?"

"Yeah?" I say while eating the low-fat Fatcakes.

"Who is that little girl?"

I realize that I have to tell Carly about this. So I put down my Fatcakes and put it back to the bag and look straight at her eyes.

"Uh, Sam?"

"I have a secret."

Carly frowns, "What is it? Tell me!"

"Remember 5 years ago? When Freddie and I were still dating? One night, I slept over at his house, a few days before I left Seattle…"

She seems to understand what this conversation is going. "And…?"

"I was upset because I had to leave you guys. I had to leave him, and I didn't know when we'd ever meet again. I loved him very much, and I don't wanna lose _it _to someone else…"

Carly holds her breath.

"So… we… had sex."

…

**A/N: Ha! Finally Sam tells Carly that she had sex with Freddie! And I'm sorry if I made some mistakes there, I didn't really re-check the spelling/grammars because I'm lazy like that.  
><strong>

**Did you guys like the chap? If you do, gimme some reviews! I need more reviews! Reviews make me happy! Please make me happy XD**

**- SeDdIeLuVeR13: **Yaaay! I've updated!

**- Embrace Your Inner Gibby: ***dancing* I love Creddie friendship too. It's cute, they're just like brother and sister. But yeah, Creddie relationship is… well, it annoys me really much. Makes me wanna puke! And thank you XD

**- ccQTccQT: **Thank you! : D


	7. Chapter 6: Telling Freddie

**Author's note in the end! R&R, peeps!**

**Disclaimer: If I owned iCarly I wouldn't be sitting here writing a fanfic. I would write an actual script. AND I WOULD HAVE MET THE HOTTEST GUY ON EARTH, MR. NATHAN KRESS!**

…

**Freddie's POV, London; 11.49 a.m**

I walk to a small garden outside the hospital and sit on a bench near a fountain. I inhale deeply as I run my fingers through my hair, messing it up a bit. I close my eyes, trying to figure out what have really happened to Sam while she left. Sure, we talked a bit yesterday, and a day before. But she wouldn't speak about her disappearance. We only talked about me. About my life. My damned life. And she said I am lucky that my life seems so fabulous. She thinks my life is complete. Yeah, not really. My life was never complete without her.

And that little girl. Who. Is. She? Is she Sam's daughter? Or Melanie's? Or their cousin? Or _me and Sam's_ daughter?

No no no no. She can't be my daughter! Can she? I mean, yes I do remember that Sam and I had sex. And yes I do realize that I forgot about that night—no I didn't forget! I was just too fuzzy and it didn't cross my mind earlier—OH MAN how could I forget that we had sex?—For Gibby's sake it was the best night I ever had—BUT I FORGOT ABOUT THAT!—how could I forgot that I had sex with Sam? But I—OH SHUT UP BRAIN, THAT IS NOT THE MAIN PROBLEM.

Yeah, we had sex. But it was just one time! I swear we only did it once. There's only a tiny little chance that Sam got knocked up, right? Because we only did it once. Once, for the God's sake. So, there is no way that little kid is our daughter.

Or maybe Sam had sex with someone else…

But that little girl called me her father.

But… Ugh!

I groan in frustration. Once again, I run my hand wildly through my hair, and then I bury my face in my hands. I take a deep breath and open my eyes to see that little girl, looking at me and gently poking my lap.

"Freddie?" says the brunette kid. Her voice is so soft, it warms my heart.

"Yes, Annie?"

"My mommy wants to see you," she grabs my hand with her little hand. I smile and stand up, and let her drag me to Sam's room. I notice Melanie is walking a few steps ahead, and then she turns around for a second to wave her hand at me. I just smile.

Annie stops walking. I look at her, "What's wrong?"

She shakes her head, "I'm just tired."

"Here, let me carry you," I say. I lift her up and hold her little body in my arms. Weird, it makes me feel warm and happy to hold her. It's like she's meant to be in my arms. "There. Do you feel better?"

She nods. And then she looks straight into my eyes, with her big ocean eyes. "Thank you." She smiles widely.

"Anytime, kid," I gently tuck her brown hair behind her ear and smile, "anytime," I whisper.

...

I let Melanie takes Annie from my arms. Annie just fell asleep. She looks really sweet when she's asleep. Her face is peaceful, her eyes flutter a bit. She's really a pretty kid. The sound of her breathing somewhat makes me feel calm.

Just when I was staring at Annie and smile to myself, Carly walks out of Sam's room. Her eyes glared at me with a disappointed (and angry…) look. She looks dangerous with that look. And then she stops right in front of me.

"Why, Freddie? Why didn't you tell me? You swore you wouldn't keep secrets from each other! How could you?" she whispers and shakes my shoulder violently. She groans and shakes her head and then leaves before I could find a word to say.

What's up with her? I just shurg.

Melanie looks at me with a sympathetic look, and then says, "Sam's already waiting for you."

I nod and mouth "Thanks," to her, and then walk inside the room. Inside, Sam is eating Fatcakes—low-fat Fatcakes, actually—and she looks up to see me. "Hola," she smiles.

I love her smile.

So I smile back, "Hola to you too."

And then an awkward silence fills the room for a brief moment. Sam finally finished eating the Fatcakes and now she's paying full attention to me. "So?"

I sigh, "So... tell me."

"Tell you what?"

"Everything. Everything that happened in the past 5 years. The reason why you left. The reason why you're here. The reaso—"

"—Kay, I get it, Benson," she still manages to look stronger than she actually is, "it's a long story."

"I don't care. I'll be here to listen to every words you say. I won't fall asleep. I'm not you, Puckett. I always pay attention in class eventhough Ms. Briggs once—"

She groans. "Why are we talking about Ms. Briggs? You wanna hear 'the story' or not?"

"Yes, yes I do." I walk toward her bed and sit beside her, on a chair. "And, um, does all of this have something to do with your bleeding nose back then?"

"Honestly? Yes."

We both are busy with our own thoughts. Until she speaks.

"The story is pretty long, but I'll try to make it as short as possible." She takes a really deep breath before telling me 'her story', "So, 5 years and a few months ago, I was diagnosed that I had an awful illness."

I thought she stopped talking to take a breath. But until the next minute, she's still quiet. "Um, what is it?"

She avoids my gaze, "Leukemia. Blood cancer."

As soon as I heard the word, I feel a sharp pain on my chest. Not literally, but it still hurts. I just sit there, mouth agape, staring at her who's still avoiding my eyes. I feel like something is stuck on my throat. I can't say anything. I don't even know how to respond. Should I cry? Should I be angry? Should I stand up and throw the table lamp?

"Freddie... I—" she stops herself from speaking. Her eyes begin to sparkle, meaning the tears are ready to fall. "This is why I didn't wanna tell you. All of you. I just... didn't wanna hurt you."

Something wet falls into my lap. I still stare at her with no expression—nothing could express how I'm feeling right now. I feel her thumb on my cheek, rubbing my cheek. And then i realize that I was crying.

"Please don't hate me," she whispers. "I'm sorry."

I shake my head. "No, I don't hate you. And you don't have to say sorry," I whisper. My voice is shaking. "So... you were... _ill_... when I... did _that_ to Carly?" I stutter.

She smiles sadly, "Yeah..."

"Oh shit... I'm so sorry, Sam... I..." I look down at my lap. I feel dirty. I feel stupid. I feel like a jerk, a bastard, an asshole, a dirt. "I..."

"No, Freddie. It's okay. I'm over it," she pulls her hand away and then holds my hand, gently squeezing it. "Now, you wanna hear the rest of the story?"

I wipe my tears and nod. Sam smiles at me like a mother who's going to tell her kid some fairytale stories. I chuckle at that thought and then looks up at Sam.

"Living in Seattle won't help me get rid of this illness. My parents offered—well, forced—me to move here, because they found a perfect place where I could be treated right. So we move here." She takes a deep breath and continues, "A few years ago, the doctor said that the... _illness_... was gone. We all thought that I was cured and perfectly fine. But a while later, the _illness_ came back, and... here I am." She says, slightly emphasizing the word 'illness'.

I slowly nod in understanding.

"I'm sorry that I never told you guys. I was scared and confused, and I didn't wanna hurt you. I knew that telling you this would make you feel bad and sad and... I just didn't want to see you like that."

I close my eyes and breathe. "Okay, I understand."

"I didn't want you guys to look for me because... well, I wanted you to move on. Sooner or later I would end up leaving you guys, really. I'd leave either Seattle or Earth. It was just the matter of time."

My heart begins to ache again. Why was she so pessimistic?

"So I left. Without looking back. Well... not really. I still looked back to the past, the times when we were all still together... without me having this illness. Especially since I have—"

Sam's words is cut because someone opens the door. Melanie and Annie. Annie is still asleep in her arms.

Melanie looks at us and realizes, "Did I interrupt you guys?"

"Well..."

"I'm so sorry! I'll come back later," she turns around and closes the door behind her.

We both still look at the door and (again) we both fall silent. Until I break the silence.

"So... when are you gonna tell me about that little kid?" I turn my head to see her.

"Uh," she blinks her eyes a few times nervously, "what do you wanna know about her?"

I shrug, "Everything."

"Everything?" she repeats.

"Everything."

"Okay."

I hold her hand while she closes her eyes. "Sam?" I say softly.

She opens her eyes and looks straight into my eyes. "Her name is Annabelle Macy Puckett-Benson."

I feel like something smacks into my chest and takes my breath—literally—away. So, I was right. I stare blankly and breathe heavily. My head feels dizzy. Oh my dearest God, I have a kid with Sam and I never knew it. Sam raised her—_our—_kid on her own. I was never there to help her. And she has an awful illness. And… I… never… knew… that… we… have… a daughter. My eyes still widen in shock.

Sam looks at me, worried. "… Fredward?"

"So, I have a kid…" I managed to whisper those words after a few moments, still with a shocked expression on my face.

…

**A/N: Ha! Freddie is shocked! Is he having a heart attack? : O**

**iDate Sam and Freddie has aired. Sadly, I haven't watched it! Well, I did try to watch it on livestream but I just found out that my dad was also using the internet sooooo the connection is going like snail. And then I just closed my laptop and jumped into my bed. GOD I woke up this morning at 5 a.m just to watch the episode (screw you time zone!) and I didn't even get to see the episode! UGH! However I just found the video on youtube (yay!) and it's almost done buffering! (double yay!)**

**And guys, I really need someone to Beta my stories. I realize that I always make a lot of mistakes, and I need someone to help me fix it! I will be really happy if one of you, my dearest readers, wants to help me!**

**Now let me respond some of your reviews!**

**- Kaitley: **Thank you! Of course, being a Carly, she is freaking out!

**- SeDdIeLuVeR13: **I did! Though the sneak-peeks are epic, it kinda upset me because it showed TOO MUCH spoilers! (but however I still clicked the video and watched it… oh well). Thanks, btw! We'll see her reaction in the next chap!

**- purpleandham4: **Thank you! I will : D

**- ccQTccQT: **haha, it was too obvious that Annie is their child… : P

**- Embrace Your Inner Gibby: **thanks!

**- jennettesobeautiful2011: **well, yeah I can see that too. But I still hope Dan won't abandon iCarly just because he's too busy with Victorious…

**- LyshaLuvsSeddie: **Here's more! : )

**Read and Review, guys! I love ya.**


	8. Chapter 7: Our Baby

**A/N: F****rom now on, before the real chap I will put the 'cliffhanger part' from the last chap. And I think I'm gonna write in Freddie's POV more often than the other character's POV (but I'm still doing Sam's POV here, just a liiitle bit). And i'm sorry for some OOC-ness, I just couldn't help it...**

**Aaaah, sorry for the long wait! My teachers are psychos. They won't stop giving me more and more assignments and, man, i seriously am going to die.**

**Have you guys watched iCan't Take It? Dude. It was REAL HILARIOUS, and the part when Sam said, "C'mon, don't be mad at mama" and Freddie just glared and said "Stop it" IT REALLY BROKE MY HEART LIKE LITERALLY. But the ending kiss... ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. I just love them so much. AND GIBBY SINGS. SINGS! OH EM GEE! I can't wait for iLove You!**

**Anyways. BIG THANKS to my lovely beta, Kaitley. Thank you, thank you, THANK. YOU! I just love you so much I can't even describe it! I love you!**

**Lastly (I'm sorry that I talk to much!) HEY IT'S MY BIRTHDAAAAAY! Hahaha! Today was probably one of the best birthday i've ever had. At school, my chemistry teacher was trying to pull a prank on me and she tried to make me cry in front of the class because I didn't do my homework (that no one even remembered to do it...), but ha! I didn't cry! And right after the the last bell rang, my best friend and some of my classmates gave me a huge paper with their signatures and a large words that said, "HAPPY B'DAY, SHABRINA!" and they even put a fake autograph (well, not exactly an autograph) of Nathan Kress. I love them very much.**

**Disclaimer: I only own my long-lasting, undying love for Nathan Kress, so, no i don't own iCarly.**

**Okay, enough talking. Enjoy! R&R**

**...**

_Previously on iWill Love You Forever:_

_Sam looked at Freddie, worried. "… Fredward?"_

"_So, I have a kid…" he managed to whisper those words after a few moments, still with a shocked expression on his face._

...

**Freddie's POV, London; 12.37 p.m**

"Yeah..." Sam's whisper brings me back to life. I try to look at her, but she avoids my eyes.

"Why... how...?" I was at a loss for words. Utter confusion.

She looks at me with a 'really?' face, her eyebrows raising, "We had sex. When a girl and a boy have sex, the girl will get pregnant. And 9 months later, they will have a baby." she plainly explained_. Same old Sam_, I thought. Even though she's dying, she's still Sam.

The thought came involuntarily. I didn't even realize I had thought it until I was reflecting on that day later.

I sigh, "I know. It's just... I never knew that I have a child... Oh my God, a child. And you're raising her on your own! What kind of a father am I?"

I panic, but she remains calm.

"It's not your fault, though. I never told you about this." She shrugs.

"Sam... we have a daughter, we should have raised her together, wh—"

"You expect me to come back to Seattle just to inform you that I was pregnant and expecting your baby?" she questions.

"I—forget it," I shake my head, trying to clear the previous thoughts; giving in.

"I'm sorry. I was scared to tell you. I… uh… you know…" she trails off. And then leans on her back.

I sigh. But then I realize something.

"Wait."

"What?"

"Have you told her that I'm her father?"

She frowns thoughtfully, then slowly shakes her head, "No... why?"

"Then how does she know that I'm her father?"

Now it's her turn to be confused. She stares at me. "Wait, what?"

"Yeah. The day I met Melanie in that cafe, Annie came up to me and said 'Are you my father?'"

"But I never talked about you

"So..." I trail off.

"I don't know..." she frowns.

And we fall into yet another awkward silence.

After a full 30 seconds, i quietly break that silence. "What did you tell her when she asked about her father? Well, me."

"I, uh, I told her that her father lives far away. And I told her not to speak of you." She looks down at her lap, ashamed.

"Why?"

"I didn't know what to say, Benson." She snaps. And sighs. "But you're right. I should have told you about her since the day I found out that I was pregnant. And we should have raised her together. She deserves to know about her father. And,  
>well, you deserve to know that you have a daughter."<p>

I stay quiet, not knowing what to say.

She looks up, and stares straight into my eyes with those piercing blues. I don't need to look much deeper to notice they are losing their sparks. She bites her lower lip, and quietly whispers, "I'm sorry."

I run my hand through my hair, just absorbing this news: taking it all in. I slightly smile. "That's okay. At least now I know the truth."

"No, not that. I mean I'm sorry for everything. I'm sorry that i—"

I cut her off.

"Sam, that's okay too. You're with me now. That's enough for me."

"Why is that enough for you?" she asks.

I lay my hand gently on her pale cheek and smile, "Because I love you." There. I did it. I just blurted out my feelings. There's no going back.

Or that's what I thought, anyways.

But instead of smiling (like I had originally expected) I see a hint of sadness and fear in her eyes. And then a large drop of moisture makes it way down her beautiful cheek.

"What's wrong, Sam?"

She wipes her cheek and shakes her head while slowly grabbing my hands and hold them.

"You… you don't love me?" I whisper softly. My heart shattered. This had to be the truth.

"I—" she vigorously shakes her head again, "Why do you love me?" she rephrases.

"…because you're Sam Puckett." _...and that's all the reason I need,_ I think to myself.

"But I've done a lot of bad things to you. So many. Too many."

We're both silent for a moment; each for our different reasons. I was just about to speak again, but she beat me to it.

"Remember when I put a dead fish in your locker?"

I frown in thought, and then grin, "Ah, yeah. One of the events that lead to our first kiss."

"…huh?" Her face was the perfect mixture of confusion and thoughtfulness.

I couldn't help but laugh at her expression. "In return, I handcuffed your wrist to Gibby's—ah, I wonder where that kid is."

She just giggles.

When she doesn't speak, i continue. "...and then you got really angry and wanted revenge. And you told the world that  
>I'd never kissed anyone. Man was I ticked. But then you felt bad and came to the fire escape where we shared our first kiss together," I couldn't help it. The goofy smile on my face had returned once again.<p>

"Ah," she nods slowly, as if savoring every last moment of the memory in replay in her mind. (At least, that's what was going through my mind.) "Now I remember."

"How could I not love the girl who shared her first kiss with me—after nearly ruining my life?"

She chuckles, "But you love Carly…" She says slowly, narrowing her eyebrows.  
>"Sam. It was years ago."<p>

She smiles but then sighs and starts playing with her nails—avoiding my gaze.

"How could I not love the mother of my own daughter?" I continue.

"But, Freddie, you don't understand."

"Make me." I challenge.

She sighs and bites her lower lip. "I might be going to leave you again—"

...

**Sam's POV; London; 1.08 p.m  
><strong>

It hurt to tell him this. Literally. The stabbing pain in my chest just wouldn't go away. I felt guilty; guilty for talking to him today, guilty for having him basically profess his love for me... Guilty of loving him back. But most of all, I felt guilty for having a kid with him. If we didn't have sex that night, then this would have never happened. He wouldn't be in so much pain now.

I couldn't help but try to conceal a tear as I delivered the horrible news.

"Wha-" I cut him off there; finishing my sentence.

"-permanently."

"What do you mean?" he asks. But I can see in his eyes that he already knows the answer.

...

**Freddie's POV; 1.10 pm**

I do know what she means. I can only hope that I'm wrong.

"I think you know clearly what I mean."

She squeezes my hand, but she's so weak that it's only faintly. And that's when I knew.

"Freddie, the doctors can't save me."

…

**A/N: Ahhhh, leave this birthdaygirl some reviews, will ya? :D hope you guys enjoy that!**


	9. Chapter 8: Butterflies in Mel

**A/N: for the sake of telling you guys how sorry I am for not updating since last week, I give you another (sort of a filler) chappie. This takes place a while after Sam and Freddie were done talking about her illness, and then Freddie came to Melanie to ask her about Annie. Hope you guys enjoy!**

**This chapter (And the last one) wouldn't be done without my awesome beta's help... so, thank you so much, Kaitley, for beta-ing this story! You're awesome!  
><strong>

**Disclaimer: As my birthday gift, Schneider's Bakery fired Dan and they hired me to be the owner of iCarly. I know, right? I own iCarly and I just turned 14. YA HEARD THAT? I OWN iCARLY! Wait... no.**

**...**

**Melanie's POV, London; ****2****.42 p.m**

Freddie and I are sitting on a table at the café. Yes, the same café where we met a few days ago.

"Come on, Melanie. Tell me," he pushes.

"I won't. Not unless Sam said so."

He groans, "The reason why I came here is because Sam told me to!" He runs his hand through his hair.

I giggle, looking at his expression. He's so funny when he's pouting like that.

"Melanie…"

"Okay, okay. Fine. What do you wanna know?"

"About Annie. My daughter." He adds an emphasis on the word "my". So he already knows.

"Hmm, Annie, huh?" I ask, trying to stall the conversation a little.

"Yup." he looks anxious, like he wants to get on with this to go back to Sam. (actually, that's probably exactly it.)

"...she's your daughter."

"I knew that!" he looks like he's going to explode. I giggle again.

"Well… long story short, you apparently did it with Sam. And then she left Seattle and moved to London. She found out that she was pregnant a few months later. And then Annie was born. We raised her together."

"But, Melanie, she had… had… that illness, right? How could she get pregnant and gave a birth to Annie?" He pauses, thinking for a second. "It was really risky, wasn't it?"

I nod. "All of us told her to get an abortion because it was too dangerous to keep the baby. She was too weak. But she refused. We did everything to convince her that aborting her baby was the best choice for her health. But we  
>failed. She really loves Annie, even when she was still inside her tummy."<p>

He looks at me, impatiently waiting for me to continue. And so I speak again.

"Somehow, she made it. she took a big risk, giving birth to Annie in that condition. But she survived. They both did. It was still unbelievable. Even the doctors were surprised that Sam could make it."

He continues to stare at me, taking it all in. And after a few minutes, once again, I continue.

"A few months after Annie was born, the doctor said that the cancer was gone. We all believed it. Sam started to live her life normally. But, as you already know, the cancer 'came back'."

He's still quiet, but right now I can tell that he's deep in thought.

I say softly, "Annie is the best gift Sam has ever had. She is wonderful. She is as strong as Sam, but she surely has your big brain. She's brilliant, although she's still very young. She is the most adorable kid I've ever seen. Everything about her is just precious. She's a miracle. She has done so much for both me and Sam."

He cracks a smile, so I do the same.

I whisper, "One day, she asked me where her daddy was. So I said, 'He's somewhere. But he loves you for sure.' And then I asked her, 'Do you wanna see him?' and she said, 'Yes. But if he doesn't want to see me, that's okay. He just needs to know that I love him. Wherever he is, whoever he is. He will always has a place in my heart.'"

He smiles widely. I love to see that look on his face.

"Yeah. She doesn't speak like a 4 year-old kid. Seriously. She's truly yours."

He chuckles.

"But of course, she eats like Sam. I need to go to the grocery store to buy a TON of meat almost three times a week. And she's STILL really small! I really don't understand how Sam and Annie managed to stay tiny when they obviously eat a lot."

We laugh. For the first time since I saw him, he grins. He's never looked as happy as this.

I start to feel something in my tummy, like butterflies. Yes, the same feeling I got when we had our first date when we were like fifteen—when he didn't believe that I existed. Wow. I never thought this feeling would come back just because of that smile.

And then it hits me.

Oh. My. God. I need to stop this! I can't fall in love with him. He loves my dying sister and she loves him back! I can't do this. I HAVE to stop this feeling.

But with one look on his face, something in my head tells me not to stop this feeling. At least not right now.

...

**A/N: I'm so sorry for making Melanie fall in love with Freddie. But i had to do this... hahaha.**

**Reviews are like the best birthday gifts. So... R&R!**


	10. Chapter 9: A Family?

**A/N: HELLO PEOPLE! It's been forever since the last time I updated this story… Well, firstly I'm gonna tell you guys that I am NOT dead. I'm just hibernating (what? LOL just kidding…) School's been freakier and freakier and I hardly have the time to write another chapter. No, seriously, I wake up everyday at 5 a.m and get back home at 7 p.m and I don't really have much time to write. But I promise I'm still updating this story!**

**Secondly, I loved writing this chapter (you'll find out why) and I hope you guys like it as well.**

**Oh, and BIG THANKS for my awesome beta, **_**Kaitley**_**. I love her very much, you all should go check out her stories!**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Nope, I don't own iCarly.**

…

**Freddie's POV, Hospital; 9.12 a.m (the next morning)**

"Are you sure you're alright?" I ask her for the billionth time.

She rolls her eyes, "Of course I am! Being horribly sick doesn't mean that I can't walk by my own Fredface."

I sigh. "I know. It's just... at least let me hold you."

"Why? You think I'm gonna fall down? Geez, I'm just going to walk around the garden. I'm not that weak," she mutters her last words and stands up, irritated and rolling her eyes.

"No! It's not like that, Sam. I just... I think I just wanna hold you. You know, it's been a long time since I..." I trail off, not sure what to say.

She raises her eyebrows and then smirks. "Well, okay then." She shrugs and grab my left arm, putting it around her waist, and we start walking. Gosh, I've really missed having Sam in my arms like this. "Now c'mon, Mama wants to walk around the garden. Oh, and do you bring my Bolivian Bacon?"

I chuckle. Same old Sam. "Yep. What's so special about it anyway?"

We step into the elevator and it starts moving down. "What's so special about what?"

"The Bolivian Bacon."

She suddenly gasps and pulls away. Her eyes get wide and her mouth is agape. "Freddie? ! Have you not tasted the deliciousness of that holy bacon?"

I slowly shake my head. "No..."

"I swear to god, if I weren't this weak, I would tackle you to the ground right now."

I frown. "Why?"

"Because!" she shakes her head in disapproval and starts walking again—after pulling my arm back to her waist. "It's amazing!" she practically yells, still in shock. "It changes you! No kidding!"

I scoff in disbelief. "Really?"

"Yes, really! It's like, the best thing that would ever come inside your mouth! It melts right there on your tongue and …" she trails off, mouth watering and with a dreamy look on her face.

I roll my eyes and laugh. "I'm sure there's something _way_ better than bacon that melts inside your mouth."

"Like what?"

I don't answer, but I lean down and kiss her lips gently. The next second, she kisses back. And I slowly slip my tongue inside her mouth. She slightly moans and puts her arms around my neck while I put both of my hands on her waist, pulling her closer. After a few seconds, we pull away and I suddenly feel scared and nervous. What a dumb move, I just suddenly kissed her! This is awkward…

She stares at my eyes and then a small smile breaks the surprised look on her face. "Yeah, it is way better than the bacon." she whispers. The elevator door slide open and we start walking to the garden.

I feel relieved that she didn't hate me for kissing her. "So... now what?"

"What?"

"Are we like..." I'm not really sure what to say, so I didn't finish my sentence. I mean, I love Sam very much and I want to live with her. I want to fix all the mistakes I've done in the past, but it's kinda too soon. I just met her a few days ago after 5 years of her sudden disappearance. But it isn't like this is a sudden rash decision. She hasn't left my mind since that moment just a few days ago.

She tilts her head to the side and puts on that 'Sam' look. You know, the 'I'm-thinking-so-don't-bother-me-or-I'll-punch-you-in-the-face' Sam look. "I don't know. Are we...?"

I shrug, "Do you want to?"

"Want what?"

"You know... start it all over?" I say softly.

"Mmm... I don't know. Maybe?" she looks up at me with those eyes.

"Maybe?"

"Maybe..." she repeats, a small smile working its way back onto her face again. Yeah, maybe we can try it again. This time, I won't be the same bastard I used to be. I swear to god, I'll never hurt her. And I'll just pretend that she doesn't have this illness. I'll pretend like everything's just normal. I'll pretend like I will spend the rest of my life with her, and she'll die because she's old, not because of this illness. After all, the doctors can be wrong. There must be a way to save her, to save my angel.

I purse my lips. "Maybe."

"Mmhm." She smiles again, fully this time.

I lean down and kiss her again. Suddenly I hear someone clearing their throat and we (reluctantly) pull away. Oh, it's just Melanie, who's holding Anna in her arms.

"Oh, hey Melanie. Hey little Annie." Sam greets the girls.

"Morning, girlies," I smile. Anna waves at me.

Melanie laughs and puts Anna down. "So, are you guys dating now?"

I can tell that Sam's blushing. "I don't know..."

"You said maybe," I tease.

"Maybe? Just maybe? You guys were making out right in front of me and you're 'maybe' dating?" Melanie rolls her eyes and laughs again.

"So now I have a father?" Anna asks. The three of us look down at her.

"Oh honey, you know that you have a father. If you didn't, you wouldn't be here!" Sam says.

"But you never tell me who he is!" Anna puts her hands on her hips and pouts her lips. Just like Sam.

"But you already know who he is."

Anna smiles widely. "Ha! I was right! Freddie Benson is my dad! That's why you put Benson as my last name!"

Wow. My daughter is adorably smart. And cute. My daughter. That word sounds odd and strange, but I think I like it. I'm a father. Fredward James Benson is a freaking father.

"How did you know, Annie?" Melanie asks, and then raising her eyebrows at us—Sam and I—with an 'I-don't-know-I-never-told-the-girl' look on her face.

She shrugs, "I don't know. My mom says I'm a smart kid. Smart kids know everything."

"Of course, you are one smart little kid," I say as I pick her up and hold her in my arms. It feels so right to have her here. One of the best feelings I've ever had. I play with her hair and she just giggles.

"Awww, now daddy's bonding wif her wittle giiiiiiwwwwl," Melanie baby-talks and Sam just laughs.

We all start walking around the garden. There are a lot of beautiful flowers out here.. there's also a small park for children too. Children… now I have one.

I shrug and smirk. "I haven't been beside her since she was born. Now I'll be here for her forever. Right, Annie?" I kiss her forehead.

Now it's Sam's turn to baby-talk, "Awww, but daddy, what about me?" She makes a puppy dog face.

I laugh, "Don't worry, Mama. This one's for you." I kiss her forehead. She smiles and rests her head on my shoulder.

"Ah, what a cute family. Makes me wanna have one," Melanie sighs happily.

A family? As in husband, wife, and kids?

"A family?" I whisper, glancing at Anna and Sam.

They just smile.

...

**4.23 p.m**

She sighs and turns off the TV. "I'm bored. Entertain me."

Lying on the couch, I roll my eyes. "What do you want _me_ to do, angel?"

"I don't know. Just don't talk about dorky stuff to me." she shrugs. Sam walks towards me and points at me, silently demanding that I should get up. So I obey her command, and she sits on the couch next to me. But then she taps her lap so I lay on the couch with my head on her lap.

"Hmmm," I make a humming sound as I begin thinking something interesting enough to entertain Sam. "Hey, Sam?"

"What?"

"Do you know Harold Atkinson?"

Sam raises her eyebrows and started to ramble: just like she always does when she gets excited. "_The_ Harold Atkinson? Of course I do. He's my favorite director! All his movies are incredible and seriously mind-blowing. He's a genius! What's up with him?"

I grin, "Did you know that… he and I were co-directing a movie that comes out in theaters next week?"

Her jaw hangs open in shock. "What?"

I nod smugly. "Mmhm."

"Wait. So you've met Atkinson, 'create' a movie that I didn't even know he was directing, and the movie is coming out in theaters NEXT WEEK?"

"Yep. And by the way, it's a sci-fi movie called Without Air. It's about what might happen if someday Earth is out of oxygen… and a lot of other stuff like a bit of romance and some scientists' future inventions. I'm not gonna spoil anything."

She gasps, "No way! I've seen the trailer once and it seemed awesome! How could I not notice both of your names as the directors?"

I raise my eyebrows. "You like sci-fi things?"

"Well, duh," she rolls her eyes as if it was too obvious, "if I didn't like sci-fi movies, I wouldn't even fall in love with Atkinson."

"Ah, so now you're in love with Mr. Atkinson, who is basically as old as your grandfather. And now, I guess you're gonna dump me because I'm not as good as him and I don't create mind-blowing movies that could make you fall in love." I fake a sad and disappointed look.

She slaps my chest playfully, "You know it's a different kind of love!"

"Really?"

"Yes it is."

"Prove it."

She leans down and lifts my chin while kissing my lips gently. I kiss back, and a few seconds later she pulls away. "At least I wouldn't do that with him."

I close my eyes and faked a relieved sigh, "Good to know."

She laughs. "I love you, Freddie."

I open my eyes to see Sam, smiling at me like an angel. "You love me?"

"Yep."

"Why?"

She shrugs, "I don't know. But you're one lucky dork who has successfully won Mama's heart."

I chuckle. "Really?"

"Oh, yes really."

I sit up and tap my lap. She lay down with her head on my lap, switching our positions. I gently stroke her hair. Yesterday Melanie told me that Sam had stopped doing chemotherapy, so now her hair is growing normally.

"Freddie?"

"Mmhm?"

"I'm glad you found me," she whispers.

"I'm glad I found you, too," I say. I lean down to kiss her forehead. "And I love you too, my blonde-headed angel."

…

**The next morning; 8.01 a.m **

"… it's okay, you didn't do anything wrong. We can't choose who we fall in love with, you know that. And it's not your fault that you fall in love with him, honey… Okay. Okay, I'll see you later. Bye."

I woke up on the couch this morning and immediately ran to the bathroom to wash my face and brush my teeth. After that, noticing that Sam was still asleep on her bed, I opened the door to reveal Carly who was talking on her phone.

She had just hung up the phone. Carly stands up, and when she turns around, she is obviously startled and almost drops her phone.

"Whoa, Freddie. I didn't notice you were here."

"Well, I just came out a while ago. Good morning, Carly."

She nods, "Good morning. How's Sam? I heard that you two are dating now."

I smile widely, "Yeah. She's getting way better now. But she's still asleep."

"Oh, okay then, I'll come back here around 10 a.m. And I'm sorry I couldn't come here yesterday, crazy paparazzi," she sighs.

"That's okay."

"So, see you later."

"See you later."

She waves goodbye and walks away.

Things are getting awkward between Carly and me. We just couldn't and still can't be the way we used to be. Our conversations are tensed up, because both of us can't forget our last year in high school without Sam. I still remember the way Carly; the sweet, nice and humble Carly, turned into a whore who spent the weekends getting wasted and slept with almost every senior student in Ridgeway. I think maybe, just maybe, she feels kind of ashamed of her past.

I walk inside Sam's room and walk towards her bed. I kiss her forehead and her eyes flutter open.

"Good morning, sweetheart."

"Yeah, good morning," she mumbles, but then she quickly drifts off back to sleep. I chuckle and kiss her cheek, and then I grab a new newspaper that the hospital gave me earlier this morning.

I notice a small picture on the corner of the front page. It is me and Carly, at the airport. The caption says:

"Carly Shay and Freddie Benson—former host and tech-producer of a famous teen webshow, now a best-selling singer in Europe and a young successful movie director—hiding from the paps in London. A little iCarly trio reunion? But where's Sam? Are Benson and Shay secretly have a secret romantic relationship? Read more on page 11."

This can't be good.

…

**A/N: Sooo? Did you love all the Seddieness? Hahaha :P**

**Don't forget, R&R! :D**


	11. Author's Note

**So, I haven't updated this story forever and I'm really sorry. And I'm sorry for you guys who are waiting for the next chapter because this is just another stupid author's note :(  
><strong>

**Actually, I already did the next chapter for this story but the file got deleted *sigh* guess my laptop is now my enemy because it always ruin my files… and then I tried to write down everything from the start but I guess my brain was just not working.**

**Anyways, right now I'm really truly busy with school and everything; I rarely even get the chance to "play" and "have fun" with my laptop. I'm in the process of graduating mid school and, seriously, here in Indonesia it isn't an easy job to graduate from school. It's not about studying on a night and taking some exams the next day and then I'm free; no. I've gotta take a LOT of exams, and I had to remember every little thing I've studied from 7th grade to 9th grade and there are a lot of things that I need to learn to get prepared for the tests. And it's really making me stressed out because I have to get really good scores *fingers crossed***

**But don't worry, I'm not discontinuing this story (or the other one I've been working on), I'm still trying to write these stories every weekend but I don't think I can finish any chapter anytime soon. The writer's block makes everything worse; it's just like my brain's not working every time I try to write the chaps.**

**Maybe, just maybe, everything will be normal as soon as I graduate—which means **_**we**_** have to wait until April or May. I promise as soon as I'm done with school stuffs (and yay! I'll get like 2 or 3 months FREE from school later!) I'll be back on track and update ALL my stories frequently. See, I'm not gonna stop writing WHATEVER HAPPENS because I love to write no matter how bad or good my stories are and no matter how many reviews/alerts I get. So, don't worry ;) I promise this story will be back sometime around April/May, or if you're lucky (or I'm lucky) I'll finish a chapter in late December or January. And the story will be good, I promise. I've got some ideas running in my brain for later chapters and I know (or hope) you guys will like it :)**

**For now, thanks for everyone who put my stories in your favorite stories/story alert or put ME in your favorite author/author alert or reviewed my stories… You guys are the best—you guys mean a lot to me. Thank you, thank you very much.**

**And I'll be really happy if you guys want to check out my newest fic, "Love and Everything In Between"; it's a story about friendship and love between Sam and Freddie, Freddie and Carly, and Sam and Carly. It's based on a really good Indonesian Novel written by one of my favorite author, Winna Efendi. I've been writing this fic on my spare time since early November and I've done 9 first chapters of this story so I'll update it frequently—but yeah, for now I'm currently working on nothing because I'm busy studying DX**

**Again, thanks for everything (and special shoutout to my friend/beta Kaitley who's helping me with iWill Love You Forever and currently helping me with Love And Everything In Between!), I love you all!**

**-Shabrina :)**


	12. Chapter 10: Little Annie

OH MY GOSH LOOK IM FINALLY UPDATING THIS STORY LOL I DONT EVEN KNOW IF ANYONE IS STILL READING THIS BUT OH WELL HERE'S THE NEXT CHAPTER OF iWILL LOVE YOU FOREVER!

Err so yeah I'm really sorry for being the worst author ever! Like I said I was going through final exam last year to pass middle school and now I'm a 10th grader in senior high school (which is basically the sophomore at high school...) and I was wrong to think that everything's gonna slow down after passing the exam, but whooops it's actually become worse! I'm now as busy as ever and _oh my god I can't believe I haven't updated in almost a year and a lot have changed here in ffn omfg_ I feel like a jerk!

But look at the bright side-It's September 22nd, 1:00 A.M in the morning here in Indonesia and guess what? IT'S MY BIRTHDAY! *does a little happy dancing* I feel so _old_...

Whoops sorry I'm blabbering. Enjoy the chapter though (if someone, by any chance, is reading...)!

Disclaimer: I don't own iCarly ok

* * *

><p><em><strong>Carly's POV<strong>_

I couldn't help but stare blankly at the newspaper in my hand. What the hell? Now everyone thinks that Freddie and I are dating, and just after he got back together with Sam, too! I was so happy to hear that my best friends were back together and now the paparazzi has to ruin it all.

I throw the papers onto my bed and sigh. Suddenly, my phone starts going off. Without bothering to look at the caller ID, I pick it up and press the OK button.

"Hello?" I angrily state, though not to the caller but to the article I've just read.

"Mm, so I guess you have read the newspaper already, Ms. Shay," says the voice of my manager, Jamie.

I sigh again. "Yep."

"It's pretty bad, isn't it?"

"It IS really bad. I mean… Freddie and Sam just got back together and now everyone thinks that 'Creddie' is happening! I don't want to hurt Sam, again. I mean, I just got her back!"

"I know." Jamie takes a deep breath. "So, what are you gonna do about this?"

I close my eyes for a moment. "I think I'll just let the rumors die down. I don't know what else to do."

"So you'll just act like nothing happened?"

I nod, although she can't see me. "Mmhm." I know that Jamie wants to talk about other things to me, but I'm too tired and distressed to even think of anything else. "I'm sort of tired. Still jet lagged," I say, hoping that she would just drop the topic for now.

"Okay, then," Jamie says. I'm so thankful that she did what I hoped she'd do. "Then I suppose I shall call you later, Ms. Shay," she says in a fake, weird accent that she made up.

I chuckle at her attempt of cheering me up. "Indeed you shall," I say, mimicking her. "Later, Jamie." I say in my normal voice.

After hanging up the call, I sit on my bed and lean on the soft, puffy pillow behind me. My sigh turned into some sort of growl—I might explode in any minute right now. I'm way too pissed off. I love my job, I really do enjoy what I'm doing right now. But I think I can never get used to all of this, the stupid, neverending rumors and the paparazzi that won't stop following me around. I'm sick of it.

I guess I wouldn't be so pissed if they were only talking about me, but now they're bringing my best friends into this. It's bad enough to know what's happened to Sam. The tough, strong Sam Puckett that I thought had left me for her own selfish reasons. Turns out she left because she didn't want to hurt me and Freddie. She left because she was sick. She's sick. She's dying. She just got back with Freddie and now there are stupid rumors about Freddie and I…

And plus, this issue with Melanie. I just can't believe what she told me yesterday—she likes Freddie? What am I supposed to do now? Which side should I be on? I mean, it's not Melanie's fault that her heart wants her to like… love… Freddie. But what about Sam?

Oh, God. Why did Melanie tell me this? My head really is going to explode.

…

_Hospital, later that day; 1:39 p.m_

"Hey, Carls," Sam greets me as soon as I peek my head inside her room. "Come in."

I smile and sit on a chair next to her bed. And then I see a little girl, no older than five, sleeping; curled up on the small couch.

Sam follows my gaze and smile at me. "That's Anna. But she prefers Annie."

I snap my head toward Sam with wide eye. "She's…"

"Me and Freddie's baby girl, yep," she nods, her smile turning wider and wider with pride. God, I should have known. They had sex for the first time a few days before Sam left. She was sleeping over, and of course Freddie wouldn't have thought of protection.

I expected myself to freak out. To scream and run out from the room with wide, unbelieving eyes. But I surprise myself by just sitting here beside Sam, feeling so calm. I don't feel anger at Sam, from keeping Annie from me, and from Freddie; nor do I feel sad because I didn't get to see Annie's early years. I just feel surprised; a mild shock, knowing that my best friends have a daughter.

Annie shifts in her sleep, a soft whiny groan leaving her lips. She's so tiny, so beautiful. She's like an angel. "She's really… cute." Well, that's an understatement.

Sam chuckles. "I know. Who woulda thought me and Fredward could create something like that?" she says jokingly, and I just laugh.

"How are you feeling, Sam?"

"Eh," she shrugs. "I don't feel really bad lately, y'know, since you and Freddie came. You guys kinda make me stronger."

Leave it to Sam for saying such deep words nonchalantly. I feel tears welling up in my eyes, sobs tightening my chest. I try not to cry because I don't want Annie to wake up, but I just can't hold it in.

"Aw, Carly… come here," she spreads her arms, letting me into her embrace. I return her hug carefully because she is so fragile and I'm afraid to break her, but she just hugs me tighter.

"I just…" I whisper between sobs, "I miss you, Sam."

"I know."

"Don't ever leave me again," I say, pulling away from her to look into her eyes.

I see hesitation lingering her eyes for a while, but she just close her eyes and whispers softly. "I'll try, Carly. I promise I'll try. I swear to God."

"Mommy?" a soft voice calls out from the couch. Sam and I turn to see Annie rubbing her eyes with the back of her hand.

"Hey, little Ann."

Annie removes her hand from her eyes and looks at us. "Can I come to you?"

"Of course. Come here, honey."

I've never seen Sam being so… motherly. It warms my heart to see her like this with her daughter. Daughter. It all still feels surreal. Annie jumps into the bed, laying next to Sam, her tiny arms wrapped around Sam's chest. Sam kisses the top of Annie's head, and I feel the edge of my lips curl up into a smile.

Annie stares at me with her big, blue eyes curiously. And then her eyes lights up with realization. "I've seen you on TV!"

Sam and I chuckle. "I suppose you have."

"Oh, and I've seen you on some pictures! Mama has lots of pictures of you and daddy," she adds happily. "Is your name Carly?"

"Yes, my name is Carly," I reply to the sweet girl.

"My name's Annie," she holds out her hand to me, and I shake it lightly. "S'nice to meet you!"

"It's nice to meet you, Annie."

Annie lifts up her head to look at her mom. "Mommy, you never told me you were friends with a girl from TV!"

"Well, now you know, kiddo," Sam says as she tickles Annie. The little girl squeals with laughter and I can't help myself to smile.

I'm glad I've finally found Sam.

* * *

><p><em>Sorry it's really short! I'm just... gahhhhh. I feel like an as-. Seriously. I'm the worst.<em>

_But thanks to my wonderful beta, **Kaitley**! She's uhh-mazing!  
><em>


End file.
